Why Celebrate Professional Milestones

In early 2018 I had absolutely no intention of returning to school. No interest in taking a class, let alone shooting for a full out PhD program. Yet here I am. Finishing my second Master’s, this time in counseling and human services and ready to begin PhD studies in the fall in counseling psychology.

But this picture, the one I plopped into this blog post was not supposed to be taken. Yes, I worked my butt off, taking 4 classes a semester, while working part-time and doing the mom duty things for the last 2 years, but I had not planned to walk across that stage at the commencement ceremony. I planned to sit at home that Sunday, maybe watch some Food Network, and certainly take a nap or two.

However, it seems my eldest son (at just 16 years old) had some wisdom that I did not.  He actually shamed me when I told him that I had not planned to walk. He told me that I should for sure celebrate this accomplishment, and that he was looking forward to seeing me take my walk of pride. I learned some things from my son that night, but I also experienced that learning on commencement day.

Here's what I realized about celebrating professional milestones.

1. It’s okay, and actually feels good to be celebrated

I admit that this may be my intense sense of martyrdom talking here. As a mom, I have done my fair share of sacrificing my time and resources for the betterment of my children. I have showed up to their games and performances, cheered (maybe too loudly) at honors awards ceremonies, and prepared lots of meals for celebratory parties for them. Yet there is something inside of me, that rejected the idea that others, who love me, would want to do the same for me.  Talk about some self-reflective work I need to do!

2. As a parent our children should bear witness to our personal highlight reel

My sister-in-laws said it best when they so kindly pointed out to me that success is modeled. Duh! I surely knew this intellectually. But I had not accounted for the fact that my kids over the last two years have seen me tired. They have seen me slide into the house at 11pm after being at class all evening. They have seen me fall asleep during family time because I’d been so dang tired.  Of course, it’s only fair that they also see the fruits of my labor as well.

On the modeling side, my allowing myself to be celebrated and marking this professional milestone, sends them the message that their accomplishments are worthy of celebration as well. This is particularly important to me as I learn to support parents in positively parenting their children.

3. Success is a communal effort

So, my husband comments often that WE finished this degree, and WE are going to earn a doctorate. Let’s just say that I don’t agree with that sentiment much, but he makes a valid point. Just like raising children, success requires a village.

Over the last two years EVERYONE in my household has had to adjust for mommy to go to school. Husband has been doing more sports pick-up and drop-off, as well as the newly minted teen driver. Folks, other than me, have been cooking meals and cleaning up. Children have been minding their own schedules, getting themselves up for school and putting themselves to bed when mom is unavailable.

So yeah, I did the academic work to earn this degree, BUT my village supported my efforts. My stage walk is an acknowledgement of their love and support as well.

4. It increases motivation for the next big accomplishment

And finally, I’m sure there are many bloggers (and research) to support that progress begets more progress. I can say that, while I am surely a bit tired and ready for a class-free summer break, I am motivated to continue my studies and reach that terminal degree.

So, if you’re about to reach a professional milestone, be it earning a certificate or degree, or even a promotion or pay raise, think about finding some way to acknowledge your accomplishment with a celebration.

Until next time,

Keya